Happy Birthday, to Me

Today, I am officially 27, hihi.

I am one step closer to 30, but I hope not people will call me auntie. :p

My age is increasing, and my belly is bulging;

My life is hectic, but I hope I won't forget simple things which make me happy.

I have been changing, really. ;)

I transform from a hamster, to an apple,  then become an unique ball with bread face.

I start to wonder the meaning behind busy working life, is it only because of money?

I drive fast to reach destination early, I walk fast to queue in the front,  I eat fast so that I could save time to settle unfinished works.

I start to forget the smell of greens, the sound of river, and the taste of wind.

I start to think, when I start building a family, with kids, shall I watching them growing, guiding them walking, or working in the office and letting the baby-sitter to witness their precious 点点滴滴?

I realized that my mum is seriously a wise lady, she had been asking me to become a teacher since I was like..... 13. :|

Despite of all kinds of thinking, I am still a happy me. :D

Happy Birthday to me, and Merry Xmas to everybody!

The Time Traveler's Wife

看过了期待已久，由畅销小说改编的电影“The Time Traveler’s Wife”，感觉就是悲，一种凄美的悲伤。

故事一开始节奏比较慢，男主角一次又一次地突然出现在另一个空间，赤裸着身体，不断地被追逐，是多么地狼狈。唯一他可以比较从容的，是当他出现在一个草地上，那里有为他准备好的衣物，还有不断等待的小女孩，一个和他相约在日后相逢的太太。

故事发展到中段，女主角一遇上了男主角，就单刀直入地表现她的爱，丝毫不拖泥带水。这是她期待已久的相遇，也许她不想浪费时间，深怕他又穿梭时空，再次不见？他不断地被吸入另一个时空，很无助，但越是无奈，就越是频密。

在婚礼上和她说着爱的誓言的他，是年长成熟的；与她共舞的他，却是年少青涩的。他们不算重婚吧？这个很可爱。他为了不让她再受伤，做了绝育手术，但她却怀了未绝育前的他的骨肉，她不算出轨吧，这个很玩味。这些片段都是令戏院里的观众会心一笑的。我觉得故事里最细心的，是让男主角充分利用他的“超能力”来赢取彩票头奖，这样还可以解释为什么他好像不用工作似的，却又有用不完的钱。

故事过后越来越悲，家庭开始趋向美满，可是死亡也开始笼罩着他。他知道自己何时会死，也看到自己将如何地离开。一个健硕的男人，在爱妻疼惜的怀抱里，述说自己是多么地害怕。身为女人，我绝对能了解她无助的心情，一个你深爱的男人将要永远离开，而且你根本不知道可以做些什么，那种感觉，任何人都不想承受。他们的女儿出奇地冷静，可能她也是个基因变种的“特别人”吧，还好有她来陪伴着妈妈一起坚强的活下去，期待着哪天还未过世的他穿梭时空过来，身上穿着永远为他准备好的衣物，在离开之前再度拥抱。

生活的历练

历练是生活的一部分，我一直都相信的。历练让人成长，这个我更不曾怀疑。

但是要承受和承担这些生活的历练，需要极大的勇气和毅力，这些不是随便嘴巴说说就能够了解和体验的。

面对新的困难的时候，我们一定会感到害怕、战战兢兢，因为人的本性嘛，就是安于现状，抗拒陌生的事物，不想离开舒服的安全范围。

但是问题总要解决，路总要走下去，要嘛你就选择放弃，躲在被窝里，安安分分地过一天是一天，简简单单地也挺快乐；要嘛就挺起胸膛，深吸一口气，告诉自己：“反正不会要我的命。”就这样去面对，时过境迁，回头看，可能会对自己的能力有意外发现，对自身的智慧增长也帮助不少，因为，智慧的增长和经验的累积，息息相关。

我是这样安慰自己的，由于公司的策略和组织变动，两个月前我从熟悉的技术领域里被抽了出来加入新的团队，是有点行销成分的，但是感觉上就是有点战战兢兢，很多东西都不太熟悉，对于行销更是没有概念。在技术领域浸了些年的我整个人就是很“技术”，平时耍闹时的牙尖嘴利一在工作时候就完全派不上用场，整个人一板一眼的，就是很注重细节和算法，感觉上整个脑袋就是慢了半拍。

唉，是有点不高兴的，但是不要紧吧，一份耕耘一份收获，其实现在看的东西多一些，阔一些，全面一些，因为牵涉到金钱和业务拓展，和市场息息相关。

好好加油吧！

PS: 好歹在假期去了些绿油油的稻田看看和海蓝蓝的渔村吃海鲜，充电啊！

快乐其实很简单

无意中看到朋友在msn写的，快乐其实很简单。快乐这个东西，是挺玄的，你可以说，它是抽象的。

我是个挺悲观的人，但是我感恩，上天让我永远保留了童真。我的心底，总有个长不大的小精灵，在我不开心，或是感觉有压力时，这个小不点就会叮叮咚咚地在我的脑袋里跑来跑去。我会自个儿咿咿呀呀的讲话（当然，我只讲给自己听:p），或者哩哩啦啦地唱歌，再不然，我就把气我的人想成是只青蛙，doink doink doink 地跳来跳去。

以前听别人说，心胸一定要宽大。现在我真的能够体会了。不要问，为什么这个人总是这么样？这个世界上为什么有这一种人？要知道，为什么他不能这么样？你所看过的，不代表全部；你所定义的，不代表是对的。

这个世界，尤其是东方国家，总有着一套所谓的道德和定义。好的教条和思想固然要推广，但不可盲目被当成定义好人与坏人的标杆。有些人的个性就是不符合世俗教条所标榜的，但只要他没做伤天害理的事，其实说白了，他也只不过是少数的那一群。与其百般挑出他的不正规，倒不如把自己的心胸放大，接纳他是个你比较少接触那类型的人。你多了个朋友，他感觉被了解了；他笑了，你也开心了。

心胸大一些，人就快乐些。

不舍，再见

今天是周五，而且下周开始我的长假，照理应该很开心才是，可是我的心情却是灰灰的。为啥？只因，不舍。

从今天开始我就正式从现在这已经呆了整整一年的项目离开。手头上的任务已经完成了七七八八，还剩下一些琐碎的，上周忙着移交给新人，偶尔抬头看看这一班相处了一年，一起奋斗、一起收拾大便 （粤语： zap xi）、一起生气、一起埋怨、一起挡子弹、一起苦中作乐、一起开大食会的工作伙伴们，心中总会浮现丝丝的不舍，但总不敢让自己的思绪停留在那边，一直告诉自己还有点时间。

今天终于发出邮件通知，正式向大家说再见，还假逗趣地尽量把邮件弄得比较搞笑。很快的，我就收到了很多的回复，有感动的，有特搞笑的，大家都知道今天会到来，可也只能笑着面对。

我会记得我们共度的每一刻，大家一起去到山长水远的树林中做测试，大家一起整个星期都只能午餐吃肯德基、晚上吃麦当劳。周末打羽毛球，看着Chris出矛照企图“老鼠吃老虎”（他所谓的深圳腔中文）。周五晚吃生锅，光头鬼祟地拿鸡翼，然后带领大家去和隔壁桌的音，帮别人唱生日快乐。还有“牛哥”不厌其烦地带着几个贪吃鬼，千里迢迢只为了吃士拉央的咖哩鱼头。最记得的是，春华（译名）的车胎没风了，大伙在雨中一个提灯，一个撑伞，有的撑起车底，有的换轮胎，那可是真挚的友情啊。

[caption id="attachment_460" align="alignnone" width="275" caption="牛排午餐"][/caption]

缘生锅，大家争着非礼叉烧

[caption id="attachment_462" align="alignnone" width="281" caption="光头争着秀肥肉"][/caption]

[caption id="attachment_463" align="alignnone" width="284" caption="Chris几乎被KC谋杀"][/caption]

[caption id="attachment_464" align="alignnone" width="286" caption="最后来张大合照"][/caption]

记得我们还未完成的约定，万挠兰姐蒸非洲鱼，还有当然就是Aman Suria 烧烤会。再见。 :)

生活的艺术 - 人

最近在工作上的体验，果真是人生的一大课，因为，我必须学会如何面对人，面对各种各样、不同类型的人，甚至是一些超乎你想象的人们。

有些人，身为领导但不会领导，外面给他施点压力，他就只会直接把工作推给下属，完全不先过滤指派任务是否合理，或是否属于部门的工作范围，更不用说在下属被其他部门推卸责任时站上来保护团队、提高士气。他觉得所有的事情都很容易，但是让他做起来他鸡手鸭脚，此刻才知道有很多看起来鸡毛蒜皮的琐碎事绝对可以影响一个任务的成败，最可怜的是，最后他说的话没什么人要听。但是他让我看到什么是没有脾气，还有我最缺乏的耐性。他也可以非常有伸缩性的让你拿假期。:p

有些人自我膨胀，认为自己的永远最对，别人正在前面解释他就马上插嘴，滔滔不绝地说出自己的大道理，再毫不喘气地要你点头说他是对的。他让我看到，不是一味地好斗和有闯劲就是厉害，很多时候，冷静地思考再有礼貌地表达真正的知识才令人敬佩。

有些人最擅长打太级，他们的口头禅是，哎呀这根本不管我的事情，你找谁谁谁吧，我只不过帮帮你而已，待会儿我就走了，你还得请我吃饭咧！他让我破坏了自己的形象，逼我说了一些严肃的话，然后同事们开始觉得哎哟你还挺凶的。

最开心的是，我遇到了一群能干、有魄力、有义气的年轻同事，我们从早见到晚，吃完午饭然后晚餐，有人的车子在雨天坏了全部人一起在雨中修理，有的撑伞有的拿灯，极之浪漫。他们让我看到舒解压力的好方法，让我领悟到人生每一个挫折都是学习的过程，让我感受到齐心协力做好项目的满足，让我真的觉得同事之间可以有友情。

感谢这一个难啃的项目让我再度成长。:)

Angelic Devil - Evan Rachel Wood

She absolutely caught my attention when I saw her picture for the first time - Evan Rachel Wood.



She looks so special, I mean, extraordinary pretty, the angelic face but yet with devilish mysterious kind of character. Just unique.

Sometimes, she is just so sweet:

[caption id="attachment_444" align="alignnone" width="200" caption="The innocent pretty lass"][/caption]

Then, you found her in:

[caption id="attachment_445" align="alignnone" width="201" caption="The wild Evan as she is famous for"][/caption]

Don't worry, I love man and choose man as my partner of life. And being a woman, I think I definitely feel paranoid if someone like her approaching my partner. :S

Luckily, she got an "unique" taste in man.

[caption id="attachment_446" align="alignnone" width="250" caption="Evan Rachel Wood with Marilyn Manson, who makes every man in the earth start looking at the mirror and wonder."][/caption]

Seven Pounds

Just back from watching "Seven Pounds" after steamboat-ing with housemates, our so-called routine activity once in months, and of course, a short break for me away from hectic work.



Why Seven Pounds? Because of Will Smith, because of Gabriele Muccino, because I was hoping for another "The Pursuit of Happyness".

But I think I'm a bit disappointed after watching it, maybe I don't really like the scene between Tim (or Ben) and Emily, for no reason. Maybe I would prefer if Tim never end his love to his wife, and he just want to help anyone as he could, regardless of whether to ease his guilt to the victims.

The front part was a bit slow, but still okay for me, pity my housemates nearly slept in the beginning. :( But I think Will Smith truly deliver the performance perfectly with his own charisma on the screen, love seeing him expressing every single emotion through his eyes. That's what I like.

What should be next? The Reader I perhaps.

感慨

这一趟回家乡，听到了不少让人感慨的事情。

爸爸好友的儿子，一个自小就天资异常聪颖，琴棋书画样样不学自通的孩子，因患上忧郁症，活在一个自己都无法了解的世界里，而选择走向了不归路，留下遗言，我找不回迷失的自己。

朋友的亲戚，一个努力向上，勤奋用工的优秀生，考上了美国麻省理工大学，前途一片光明，却不幸遭受毫无人性的黑人侮辱。一个在陌生的国度里，对前途满怀期待的好女孩，接受不了肉体上的羞辱，精神崩溃了。

人越是年长，越会发现世事根本不得由你去控制，也更能体会到活在当下的道理。

我不求什么，只求身边的人健健康康，快快乐乐。 愿大家努力工作，认真生活，笑着过每一天。

Life is Fun

How can I conclude my life recently? BUSY!

Weekday, I work until 11pm, go home take bath then continue to work again, until 2am, sleep, wake up at 8:30am (luckily :p), then another busy day.

Weekend, I wake up slightly late, but no shopping no chill out, work from home till late too.

WHAT A LIFE! And you may ask why? Because the Maxis 3G network swap project is in the full swing now, plus my manager who is the strongest player in my team being pulled out from project to concentrate in management, what makes it worse is, my team (now left with 2 kolian engineers) is responsible for the bloody-no-mistake KLCC area. :(

Anyway, things must have their bright side too! To be frank, the heavy workload that I'm having now, at least helps me adapting to the life after my bf leaving Msia again, because I got no time to miss him at all. :p Plus, the workload makes me feel that I'm worthy for the pay, I mean... hey boss you should pay me more! Haha. Then I have one big bonus from thousand miles, a Gucci bag to reward me working so hard recently, of course not from my boss. :p

Great friends always support and care on me. Housemates always call when they haven't seen me at home after 11pm, some friends even finding job for me, LOL! And, our jalan jalan cari makan gang wouldn't stop traveling for food! Travel all the way to Ampang for the genuine yong tao fu... I had a great day because that is the first time I really visit Ampang, I love going somewhere new and seeing something fun! :D

Busy work won't stop me from enjoying my life, will visit bf's sister for her new-born baby after today's work. Baby I'm coming!

We Will Remember You - The Sweetest Angel

11:59pm, 31st Dec 08, while everybody was busy celebrating the new year countdown, my sweet and pretty colleague came from China, was struggling after a hit.

2:00am, 1st Jan 09, while everybody was still fascinated with the awesome firework performance, the kind and helpful young girl, passed away without seeing her boyfriend and parents in oversea.

As a responsible and hardworking engineer, as usual, she worked until 9pm++ on new year eve. She was rushing back to the apartment to pack her stuff, because she had to fly off to Brunei for another project the other day. Rushing to cross the road, the next minute she knew, she was already lying on the road, after being hit by a speeding car.

There were rumours and speculation, that it was a hit and run, that she was afraid to use the pedestrian bridge because there were many cases happened there, that she was there for very long time before people saw and sent her to hospital. I do not know about this, and I couldn't justified, all I know is, an old couple lost their beloved daughter, a guy working hard abroad lost the one in his life.

I did not have much expression on face for the whole day, no weeping, no groaning, nothing, because the pain is so deep inside. The saddest thing is, you know you can do nothing to change this. You can do absolutely nothing to bring her back.

Keep praying, I hope the mantra helps.

The warmest and sweetest smile, that is something that we will never forget.